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Uzziah Rehoboam Proprietor Ararat Building Supplies

Topic: religion

Uzziah Rehoboam, Proprietor, Ararat Building Supplies

Mr Noah, Clayside, via Ararat Downs

4560 BC

Dear Mr Noah,

Thank you for your enquiry regarding timber for your planned boat. I must say when you quoted me the dimensions of your project I was rather taken aback. I can't say I've ever seen such a large request, and it is partly for this reason that I cannot fill your order quite as you asked.

Allow me to explain. Cedar and huon pine are the two preferred oat-building timbers, as you would know. Unfortunately they are rather prestigous and expensive timbers, and are in tremendous demand at the moment, particularly with the current boom in the entertainment industry. The owners of most of the new dens of iniquity around here want the finest panelling they can get for their clubs. For example, that new place The Fleshpot took most of the huon I had, and The Cesspool needed so much cedar I had to slip in a couple of cubits of mahogany.

The best I can offer you is a discount on some gopher wood. It's quite inexpensive, I've got a lot of it, and researchers say it will last up to thirty-five days and nights in water before it waterlogs and sinks, so it should be fine for a trailable like yours. Only thing is, it's quite hard to work with and it might take a hundred years or more for you to build this vessel! However, with plenty of help you should be fine. Maybe those three sons of yours with the funny names could take some time out from being fruitful and multiplying for a bit.

Let me know what you decide, and thanks again for considering us.

Yours sincerely,

(Signed) Uzziah Rehoboam

PS: Many thanks for the offer to take me along, but if I don't hang around at the moment the business is in danger of going under. See you when you get back.


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