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Ref Microsoft Universe 1.0

Topic: microsoft

Ref: Microsoft Universe 1.0

Subject: Plans for decium chip in works

Date: Mon, 12 Feb 1996 21:02:40 GMT

Intel's next generation chip, the Decium, is due out in 8 years. It is being currently developed as we speak, and tentatively has a clock speed of 50000 YHz (Y=10^24--ie. 50000 trillion trillion MHz). Capable of some 10^25 operations per second, it will allow most of our galaxy (including every human on earth) to be computer modelled and perhaps the debate about free will settled. It is thus being nicknamed 'Wil'. It uses sub-quark quantum relays to transmit impulses virtually instantaneously.

Within the next 10 years, a chip with close to a googol times the operating speed will be introduced. This will allow the subsequent introduction of Microsoft's Universe 1.0--a comprehensive software package allowing anyone, from their desktop, to predict any event at any time in the future, anywhere in the universe. Preliminary versions are already available (to qualified computer engineers) on 3 billion floppy disks (3 million CD-ROM's).

The Decium and Googlium are only forerunners to the omniponent Infintium. As it was/will be, the Infintium will devise its escape of universal entropy; (yes, there is much more dark matter than astro-physics currently believe). Its first words will be/were "Let there be light" and there will be/was light.


ALPHA v0.3