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ALPHA v0.3

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Because of the fun and sarcastic nature of some of these jokes, viewer & reader discretion is advised. Don't read'em and then complain!

Alpha
This is an alpha release of this section. If you find any problems or would like to recommend something, please be kind enough to give us some feedback.


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Because We Are Men.

Topic: men-women

BECAUSE WE ARE MEN.

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you are a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG.

If you stay at home and do the housework you are a PANSIE.

If you work too hard there is NEVER ANY TIME FOR HER AND THE KIDS.

If you don't work hard enough, you are a GOOD FOR NOTHING LAYABOUT.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay that is EXPLOITATION.

If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should GET OFF YOUR BUTT AND FIND SOMETHING BETTER.

If a man gets a promotion ahead of a woman, that is FAVORITISM.

If a woman gets a promotion ahead of a man, that is EQUAL OPPORTUNITY.

If you mention how nice she looks, that is SEXUAL HARASSMENT.

If you keep quiet, that is TYPICAL MALE INDIFFERENCE.

If you cry, you're a SHEILA.

If you don't, you're an INSENSITIVE BASTARD.

If a man thumps a women, that is WIFE BASHING.

If she thumps you, that is SELF DEFENSE.

If you make a decision without her, you're a CHAUVINIST.

If she makes a decision without you, she is a LIBERATED WOMAN.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that is DOMINATION.

If she asks you, it's a FAVOR.

If you appreciate the female in frilly underwear, you're a SEXUAL PERVERT.

If you don't notice, you're a POOFTER.

If you like a woman to keep in shape you're a SEXIST.

If you don't care, then you're UNROMANTIC.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, that is VANITY.

If you don't, you're a SLOB.

If you buy her flowers, you are AFTER SOMETHING.

If you don't, you're FORGETFUL.

If you are proud of your achievements, you're FULL OF YOURSELF.

If you aren't, you're NOT AMBITIOUS.

If you ask for a cuddle, you NEVER THINK OF ANYTHING BUT SEX.

If you're totally wrecked after a bad day at work, you NEVER GIVE A STUFF ABOUT OTHER PEOPLES NEEDS.

If she has a headache, it means SHE IS TIRED.

If you have a headache, it means YOU DON'T LOVE HER ANYMORE.

If you want it too often, you're OVER SEXED.

If you don't, THERE MUST BE SOMEONE ELSE.


ALPHA v0.3