theparticle.com

ALPHA v0.3

Disclaimer
Because of the fun and sarcastic nature of some of these jokes, viewer & reader discretion is advised. Don't read'em and then complain!

Alpha
This is an alpha release of this section. If you find any problems or would like to recommend something, please be kind enough to give us some feedback.


BACK

Car Names And What They Mean

Topic: g-rated

Car Names and What They Mean

BUICK

Big Ugly Import Car Killer

Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

Big Ugly Indestructible Compact Killer

CHEVROLET

Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips

Car Has Extensive Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips

Cracked Heads, Every Valve's Rotten, Oil Leaks Every Time

DODGE

Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater

Dead Old Dog Going East

Dead On Day Guarantee Expires

Dead On Delivery - Go Easy

Dead On Delivery, Guarantee Expired

Dead Or Dying Garbage Emitter

Drips Oil, Drops Grease, Everywhere

EDSEL

Every Day Something Else Leaks

FORD

backwards --> Driver Returns On Foot

backwards --> Driver Returned On Foot

Fails On Rainy Days

Fastest On Road, Dip!

First On Race Day

First On Recall Day

First On Road to Dump

First On Rust and Deterioration

Fix Or Repair Daily

Flip Over, Read Directions

Found On Road, Dead

Found On a Rubbish Dump

Fraternal Order of Restored DeSotos

Frequent Overhaul, Rapid Deterioration

Friggin' Ol' Rebuilt Dodge

Follow Our Ruddy Dogsled

Fond Of Resonating Decibels

Finally Obsolete Racing Device

Fabricated Of Refried Dung

Forgot Our Recommended Defaults

Foot On Road Decelerates

First Order of Reproductive Discipline

For Old, Rotten Deadbeat

Flintstone Or Rubble Driven

Fireball On Rear Denting

Frequently On Ritalin Designers

Fantastically Orgasmic Realistic Dream

Found On Russian Dump

Failed On Research & Development

Fatal Oral/Rectal Delivery

Famous Odor Resistant Dog

Forlorn, Old, Ratridden Dustbin

Fatally Obese Redneck Driver (onboard)

Free Or Reduced Drastically

Forced On Reluctant Drivers

Frequent Opinion: Really Disappointed

Found On Redneck's Driveway

Fumes and Odors Readily Detectable

Fast Only Rolling Downhill

Features O.J. and Ron's DNA

Flipping Over Results in Death

GM

General Maintenance

GMC

Garage Man's Companion

Generally Mediocre Cars

Get More Chicks

Got More Cr*p

Got a Mechanic Coming / Gotta Mechanic Coming

HONDA

Had One Never Did Again

HYUNDAI

How Your Usual Nerd Drives An Import

Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive...

LTD

Long Term Debt

Lousy Transportation, Dammit!

Little Tin Dream

Last Try from Detroit

Long Time Driving

MAZDA

Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

MG

Money Guzzler

MOPAR

Miscellaneous Oddball Parts Assembled Ridiculously

Most Often Passed At Races

Mostly Old Paint And Rust

Mostly Old Parts And Rust

My Old Pig Ain't Running

My Only Problems Are Repairs

OLDS

One Leak, Dead Starter

OLDSMOBILE

Oh, Look, Dammit! Some Massive Oil Burning Idiot's Leaking Everything.

Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Every day.

Old Loose Dented Sheet Metal Out-dated By Infamies Like Edsel.

PINTO

Put In Nickel To Operate

PLYMOUTH

Please Let Your Mother Out from Under The Hood

PONTIAC

Poor Old N****r Thinks It's A Cadillac

Puts Out Noxious Toxins In All Cities

PORSCHE

Piece Of Retired Scrap, Continually High Expense

Probably Obtained Recently Since Car-owner Hocked Everything

PROBE

Plainly Runs Only By Exception

SAAB

Send Another Automobile Back

Stupid, Arrogant Arsehole Babies

Such An Arrogant B**tard

Swedish Automobile - Always Broken

Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

Swedish Automobiles Are Best

TOYOTA

Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VW

Virtually Worthless


ALPHA v0.3