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ALPHA v0.3

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Employee Evaluation Form

Topic: corporate

Employee Evaluation Form

Name: _______________________________________________ Date: __/__/____

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Knowledge: ___ The son of a bitch really knows his shit. ___ Knows just enough to be dangerous. ___ Only half a brain and is dangerous. ___ Fucking brain dead. His coffee cup has a higher IQ. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Accuracy: ___ Does excellent work if not preoccupied with pussy. ___ Pretty good. Only occasionally blows it out his ass. ___ Has to take his shoes off to count higher than ten. ___ Couldn't count his balls and get the same number twice. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Attitude: ___ Extremely cooperative (if you kiss his ass frequently). ___ Brown noser in good standing. ___ Often pisses off co-workers. Thinks he owns the place. ___ Doesn't give a shit. Never did, never will. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Reliability: ___ Really a dependable little cocksucker. ___ Works so hard must take an extra day off each week. ___ Can rely on him to be the first one out the door. ___ Totally fucking worthless. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Appearance: ___ Extremely neat. Even combs his pubic hair. ___ Looks great on his day off. ___ Flies leave fresh dog shit to follow him. ___ Dirty, filthy, smelly son of a bitch. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Performance: ___ Goes like a son of a bitch if there's money in it. ___ Does all kinds of good shit at evaluation time. ___ Works well after an enema. ___ Couldn't do less if he were in a coma. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

Leadership: ___ Carries a chainsaw and gets good results. ___ Macho attitude. Commands total disgust. ___ Dog fasted 3 days last time he brought home pork chops. ___ Mother Teresa told him to get fucked. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

I understand that I have been evaluated and understand my rights under the privacy act of 1974. I further acknowledge that I am fucked up as a football bat and will make an effort to correct my deficiencies. _______________________________ Employee's Signature


ALPHA v0.3