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ALPHA v0.3

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Because of the fun and sarcastic nature of some of these jokes, viewer & reader discretion is advised. Don't read'em and then complain!

Alpha
This is an alpha release of this section. If you find any problems or would like to recommend something, please be kind enough to give us some feedback.


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A Farmer'S Guide To Computers -----------------------------

Topic: computer

A FARMER'S GUIDE TO COMPUTERS -----------------------------

BATCH - A 'Whole Lot' like the batch of biscuits my wife bakes for breakfast.

BIT - The part of the bridle that goes in the horse's mouth.

BYTE - What the horse might try to do when you put the bit in its mouth.

CALLING SEQUENCE - Rules for a Hollerin' Contest.

CHARACTER - Wendell Smith up the road. He could make a dog laugh.

CHIP - My son. My wife says he's off the old block!

CONVERSION - What happens to some folks at our Spring Revival.

DEBUG - Picking beetles off plants and dropping them into a can of kerosene.

DEBUGGING AIDS - Grandchildren.

DISKETTE - What you do to a field after you plow it.

DOCUMENTATION - What the Vet does.

ECHO CHECK - Hollerin' twice from the same place.

FIXED FIELD - It's ready to plant.

GARBAGE - I haul it off myself.

INPUT - Labor, seed, and fertilizer.

JOB STACKING - Working in the hayfield.

KEYBOARD - The beam above the kitchen door where we keep the keys.

MAIN MEMORY - My wife's - She never forgets anything.

MENU - It all depends on what's in season.

MODEM - What I did with my oats before Job Stacking.

OUTPUT - Crop from my 'Input'.

RAM - Ramses Rogers down the road. Drives a red pickup.

ROM - Ram's twin brother. He drives a red pickup too. Can't tell 'em apart except for their mufflers.

SECONDARY MEMORY - My dad's. If my wife can't remember it, my dad can. He'll be 93 next month!!


ALPHA v0.3