ALPHA v0.3

Because of the fun and sarcastic nature of some of these jokes, viewer & reader discretion is advised. Don't read'em and then complain!

This is an alpha release of this section. If you find any problems or would like to recommend something, please be kind enough to give us some feedback.


Technical Dictionary --------------------

Topic: computer

Technical Dictionary --------------------

Modem What landscapers do to dem lawns.

Token Ring A virtual engagement gift.

Ethernet A device for catching the Ether Bunny.

DataPac A size 14 girl in a size 8 bikini.

Asynch A place to wash your hands.

Bysnch The place where Elton John washes his hands.

BBS Tall tales told by insects that produce honey.

ASCII The ancient god of telecommunications. Rumored to give vast amounts of data to believers. Hence, the phrase "ASCII and you shall receive."

Block Parity One heck of a good time.

Carrier Detect Raison d'etre for premarital blood tests.

File Transfer Procedure followed by INFORMATION CENTER staff who are tired of their present jobs.

Hayes Compatible Prone to riding with a grizzled old cowhand who sings off-key. Gene Autry is the industry standard.

Serial Interface A spoon.

Terminal Emulation A function performed by a canary that lays on its back with its legs in the air.

X-Modem A device on the losing end of an encounter with lightning.

ALPHA v0.3