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ALPHA v0.3

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Teleprocessing Terminology --------------------------

Topic: computer

TeleProcessing Terminology --------------------------

Application -- To put on paint, wallpaper, etc Access Method -- Door, window, etc Address -- How you find your way home ASYNC -- One sync BISYNC -- Gay sync Byte -- A light snack Nibble -- A lighter snack Bit -- Something to put in a horses mouth Backup -- Use reverse gear Bert -- Ernie's friend on Sesame Street Bipolar variations -- Gay ARTIC bears Bind -- What you get into on a TP call Unbind -- The excuse you use to get out of a bind Block -- Prevent a tackle Bridge -- Lets you cross the bit stream Buffer -- Used to polish cars, floors ,shoes, etc Bus -- A way to ride from one terminal to another Cache -- Better than a check Check character -- You tell him you would prefer cache Carrier Detect -- What a Navy pilot hopes to do after a mission CSU -- Tell the customer to set it up himself Channel -- What you tune your TV to Copper -- A person who gives out speeding tickets Domain -- Similar to Chow Mein and Lo Mein Down Level -- The next floor down Drop -- Didn't catch the pass Error Recovery -- How to get an error back if you lose one Endless -- See "Loop" Encryption -- What Egyptians did with mummies Explicit Route -- How your wife tell you to come straight home Virtual Route -- When you come "straight home" via the bar FELINE -- A furry creature with nine lives, also shreds curtains Fiber -- You get it from bran Filter -- Keeps your oil clean FIREBIRD -- A car made by pontiac Flag -- What you run up the flagpole Frame -- Around a picture, or blamed for something you didn't do Gateway -- Lets you get through the fence Hardware -- Football helmet, armor, hardhat, etc Host -- The person who invited you to the party Hex -- A voodoo curse ISO -- With "metric"...a form of exercise Lan -- What you buy by the acre Lead -- A sales tip Line -- What you use to pick up girls Line Impairment -- When your line doesn't work Link -- Something which falls off a bracelet Lobe -- Where you hang token-rings Loop -- See "Endless" Mark -- A smudge on the paper Moss Terminal -- A rolling terminal gathers none Multidrop -- More than one drop, too many and you're off the team NAK -- Get the hang of it NAUN -- Not a verb NODE -- Gets stuffed up when you have a code Pad -- A place to sit, or an apartment Parallel -- A method of parking along a curb Parity -- Equal pay for equal work Path -- Place to walk Phase Jitter -- What you get from drinking too much Port -- A variety of wine, or where you sail your ship from Protocol -- How to act when you meet the queen Receiver -- Catches footballs, (see "Drop) Repeater -- Says things more than once, more than once Ring -- What the phone does before you pick it up Serial -- A breakfast food Server -- A. K. A. Waiter Session -- With your analyst, about $75 an hour Shift -- Change gears in your transmission Sidestream -- What non-smokers complain about Software -- Silk, cotton, fur, wool Space -- The final frontier Start/Stop -- 08:00/16:45 Sync -- Where you wash your hands T/P -- Mandatory in bathrooms Terminal -- Where you catch the bus Token-ring -- A vehicle for pre-marital sex TP Expert -- A figment of your imagination Trace -- One way to copy a drawing Transmission -- 5-speed, 4-speed, automatic, etc Trouble shooting -- Can't hold the gun steady Turnaround -- What you do when you realize your going the wrong way Twisted Pair -- Deviant sexual activity Up Level -- The next floor up User -- Junkie Zero Insertion -- What a check forger does


ALPHA v0.3