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ALPHA v0.3

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Alpha
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G.A.S.

Topic: adult

G.A.S.

We are pleased to announce a new professional corporation, GAS, that will specialize in interpersonal relationship building and maintenance for men. Founded by three of America's foremost authorities on successful intimate relationships, GAS will open its doors to those millions of Americans men who are facing severe problems in their ability to maintain loving interpersonal relationships. O. J. Simpson will head the relationship building and maintenance division. Using his 40 plus years of experience with all types of woman, O. J. will be able to help you build and maintain that loving, caring relationship which for many American men is a fleeting dream. And, should you find yourself experiencing severe problems, O.J. is America's foremost expert on how to CUT right through the bull and get to the heart of the matter and settle the problem once and for all. Next, we have Frank Gifford, one of the most admired broadcasting figures in America. Frank will head the extra-marital affairs division. This is where you will learn from a master how to have all the affairs and one-night-stands you want and still keep your wife and/or girlfriend as a happy camper. Frank is a master in his ability to sweet talk his way out of any relationship-threatening situation and he will guide you step-by-step in how you too can cheat, cheat, and cheat and still keep the lady smiling. Last, but not least, Marv Albert will head the intimate apparel division. This is where the American male will be able to develope and express his feminine side through the use of various types of panty hose, panties, stockings, bras, and other sexual clothing for the modern American male. In addition, Marv will also provide an extensive inventory of chains, locking devices, whips, and other instruments of sexual torture that will bring your woman to the height of orgasmic delight as you employ the various ALBERT methods of sexual stimulation while you project your feminine side. There is not a known man-woman relationship problem that the GAS professional corporation cannot solve. So if you are experiencing any type of problem in your current relationship- pick up that telephone and call: 1-800-men-only, today. You have nothing to lose but your current frustration.


ALPHA v0.3